2010 – where to start? Last year was a time of big change for me. Personally, professionally, emotionally, and intellectually. To say it was a difficult year would be an understatement. I buried one friend, and one acquaintance. I broke off a 3 year relationship. My business was sued and went all the way to trial. I fell in love and promptly had my trust horribly betrayed. I voluntarily moved out of the home I had lived in the longest in my entire life. I gave up my dogs. I spent half the year in the depressing wasteland known as suburban Detroit. I produced a film which was a constant battle on set and off every day. I watched as close friends went through divorces, lost parents, and lost jobs. I left 2010 feeling buffeted about by life in general.

Now this isn’t a feeling I’m comfortable with. I am not a victim of circumstance. I created a magical life which I (in general) love from a place of nothing. I take pride in the fact that my life is how I’ve decided to make it. So I was left wondering what I am supposed to be learning from the past year. I mean, for the love of God, people don’t have years like that for nothing…right?

But as I look back, I realize I also let the year affect me in ways I shouldn’t have. I practically stopped writing. I almost entirely stopped shooting pictures. I fell out of touch with some people who are very important to me. I stopped trying to grow my business, and just maintained. I can’t come up with a single new challenge I gave myself and took on. For the love of God, I didn’t even leave the country once last year. And none of that is “me”.

So, my 2011 is going to be about a year of rebuilding. Of putting my life back together in a new, better form than it has ever been. Because THAT, my friends, is what I do and who I am. I figure out solutions. I live with a smile on my face, embracing challenges and asking life “what else ya got for me?” That is the person I see in the mirror, not a person who just drifts through, taking what is handed. I self-identify as a risk taker, challenge seeker, problem solver, and joyful, joyful person. New home, new relationship, new ways of doing business. By the end of 2011, I expect my life will look nearly unrecognizable from where it is now.

Tags: 2010, 2011, Friends, love, regular life

This entry was posted on Thursday, January 6th, 2011 at 1:36 am and is filed under Non-work, Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.